Ten reasons why being on "Junkyard Wars" is better than being on "Survivor":

  1. You don't have to eat rats.  You don't even have to catch rats.  Rats fear you.  So does everyone and everything else.
  1. Your torch isn't from Pier 1 Imports.  It's made by Airco and it can slice a railroad rail in half quicker than you can say "Mind The Gap."
  1. You drive cool 4-wheel ATVs as fast as you dare.
  1. Forget the bathing suit. You get issued flame-resistant flight suits, two-way radios, safety goggles, and a Leatherman.
  1. After 10 hours of unbelievably intense physical and mental effort, you get cold beer, hot showers, and rooms with real beds.
  1. Which would _you_ rather play with: a fish-hook made from a rusty paper clip, or a 50-ton Caterpillar excavator/dredge?
  1. A camera worthy incident isn't your decision to share the fish you caught. A camera worthy incident is cutting a Land Rover in half.
  1. Somebody else cleans up whatever mess you make.  Even the holes in the steel floor.
  1. The only sunblock you need is a flip-up welding helmet.
  1. You don't get voted out by failing to backstab the right person.  You get voted out by having your creation explode on-camera in a hail of flesh-rending shrapnel and fireballs of burning gasoline.
Ten reasons why Junkyard Wars is better than Iron Chef.

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